Good news everyone!
My social anxiety drastically improved between 13 and 30.
The middle schooler who put her head on her desk to avoid everyone and stared awkwardly when asked about it has become a high functioning and community oriented adult.
Bad news: COVID happened (and is happening).
Like most people, I have spent the last 18 months navigating new levels of solitude.
Thanks to trends in Austin showing a decline in cases, I have been slowly returning to my “people — person” status. As I emerge from my cocoon and resume attending networking events, I am noticing older versions of my inner thoughts resurfacing.
And they are NEEDY!
Recently, as I was driving home from an event my mind was filled with middle school worries:
Did they think I was weird?
Why did I say that?
Was I coming across as funny or just strange?
Why did I even go?
What if nobody likes me?
And there were of course the meta — anxious thoughts like, “I am a thirty one year old, therapy going, community building adult, what is happening?”
I chose to be kind to myself and find the humor in it. I called a compassionate friend who she reassured me and laughed with me about these unique challenges we’re facing.
Those thoughts aren’t really just middle schooler thoughts. They are human thoughts. We can experience social anxiety at any age, and we’re not less mature for struggling with it.
We all learned to navigate social situations by practicing and we are all out of practice. Honestly, we are all probably feeling some version of social anxiety as we get back into the swing of things. And we can all use a reminder that we CAN navigate new places, people, and cultural situations, even if it feels scary right now.
I am curious to know if you are dealing with something similar. How are you being kind to yourself as old thought patterns arise?
Anna Westbrook
AnnaWestbrook.com
IsabelandtheRunawayTrain.org